When parents separate, agreeing arrangements for children can be challenging, particularly around important holidays and celebrations. While school holidays and birthdays are often discussed early on, religious celebrations such as Easter, Eid, Diwali, Passover or Christmas can sometimes be overlooked. For many families, these occasions are deeply significant and form an important part of a child’s identity, culture and upbringing. As family solicitors, we encourage parents to address these issues early and include them in a clear parenting plan to minimise the risk of disputes in the future.

In England and Wales, the court’s primary consideration when making decisions about children is their welfare, as set out in the Children Act 1989. Therefore, in determining what arrangements are in a child’s best interests, the court will consider a range of factors which include their cultural and religious upbringing.

For many children, religious celebrations are not only about the event itself but also about spending time with extended family, taking part in traditions and maintaining a connection with their cultural background. When parents separate, it is important that these elements of a child’s life are preserved where possible and where religion forms an important part of a child’s life it is best to give that child the opportunity to continue participating in their religious celebrations and traditions.

There are many practical ways separated parents can accommodate religious celebrations within their arrangements. These might include:

• Allowing the child to spend certain religious holidays with the parent who is involved with that religion.
• Alternating celebrations each year where both parents celebrate the same event.
• Splitting a celebration across different days where appropriate.
• Ensuring the child can participate in family gatherings or religious services.

For example, in some families a child may spend Eid with one parent while spending Christmas with the other. In others, parents may alternate celebrations annually. The most appropriate arrangement will depend on the family’s circumstances, the child’s routine and the importance of the celebration to each parent.
The key is for parents to communicate openly to focus on what will benefit their child, rather than approaching arrangements from a position of competition between the adults.

An effective way to avoid misunderstandings is for parents to record their agreements in a parenting plan. A parenting plan sets out in writing how they intend to care for their children to provide clarity to significantly reduce the likelihood of disputes. Although a parenting plan is not automatically legally binding, it can be made legally enforceable in a formal court order agreed by consent.

A well-prepared parenting plan might include:

• Regular weekly arrangements for the child
• School holiday arrangements
• Birthdays and special occasions
• Religious celebrations and cultural events
• Communication arrangements between parents and the child
• How future disagreements will be resolved

Including religious celebrations within a parenting plan helps ensure both parents understand what has been agreed and allows the child to maintain consistent traditions year after year.

If parents cannot reach an agreement about arrangements for religious celebrations. In those circumstances, it may be helpful to seek support through mediation before considering court proceedings.

If parents remain unable to agree, it may be necessary to make an application to the Family Court to determine a particular question relating to the child’s upbringing, such as where a child should spend a particular religious celebration or holiday.

Ultimately, arrangements around religious celebrations should always focus on the child’s wellbeing and sense of identity. Celebrations often provide children with stability, continuity and an opportunity to maintain strong family connections.

If you are separating and would like advice about arrangements for your children, including how to structure a parenting plan, seeking early legal advice can help you navigate these discussions constructively and avoid unnecessary conflict.

By Elly Bradford, Trainee Solicitor at Hopkin Murray Beskine solicitors.